 I’ve been staring at this computer all day, typing away, my eyes feel like they are on fire. I’m not sure who is more uncomfortable, him or me, at least I’m sitting in a chair. He’s been sitting on the floor, with his legs crossed all day. Three more hours till I’m out of here. “Will you stop that clicking noise,” he snaps. “I need to type, it’s my job, I’m a writer.” “Seems super boring, click, click, click,” he says mockingly, gesturing with his hands. He is so annoying. He sits around all day doing nothing except watch me and follow me around. Sometimes it’s nice to have him around, someone to talk to, someone that listens to me. But other times, he is like a nasty rash that you can’t get rid of. Not that I’ve ever had a nasty rash, it’s just what people say. Although, I think I would rather have a nasty rash than him. With a rash, you know it will eventually go away. Him, he’s been there my whole life. Okay focus.…in these critical times…or complex times? no critical, I think… investors and banks need access to financial funding that is not…. “Will you stop that? I’m trying to write!” I say rolling my eyes. “I feel like singing, just ignore me.” “I can’t just ignore you when your singing Adele in that awful cat-like squeal, just stop please.” “You used to love me singing.” “Yeah, when I was a kid, and I didn’t have to work and hit deadlines!” “Remember that time at Disneyland, we were singing so loud in the hotel, and your dad went ballistic?” That brings an elusive smile to my face. “Yes, I remember, it was rather funny.” I’m starving, didn’t eat breakfast. I think I will eat that salad. Needs fewer onions but it’s still good. I think these tomatoes are the best I’ve ever had. He looks at me and then the salad, and then back to me. “A salad, again?” “Shut up!” I growl. “I mean, you flip flop back and forth on these ridiculous diets. One minute you’re bingeing on cheese puffs and candies, then you’re starving yourself eating crackers and water.” “I know I know! What do you want me to do? Nothing seems to work for me," I say as I whip the fork into the salad piercing a piece of lettuce. I hate him. “Exercise, exercise, exercise. You can’t do one and not the other. You need to eat healthier AND exercise,” he moves his arms back and forth as if running. He’s right. “You’re right, I know.” His raises his eyebrows at me. “Let’s walk home tonight instead of riding in one of those grubby cabs. Come on, finish clicking, and let’s go.” “I need to finish this article for Friday’s paper.” “Work, work, work. I don’t see what all the fuss is about. I don’t work; it’s no big deal.” Ok, so where was I … restricted by governments outside of…. “Do you overeat because mom and dad judged you all the time?” Aaaaarrrrrrr, I’m never going to get this finished. “What?!” “Mom and dad… not my mom and dad, your mom and dad, they were always making comments about you not being good enough. Dad never hugged you or told you how much he loved you. Mom always had that condescending tone to her voice, didn’t she? ‘Clair Clair.’ Is that why you overeat? To spite her?” “I don’t know, maybe.” “Every cheese puff you eat is a slap in the face of your mother, right?” he says nodding his head. He always does this. Now my mind is racing and I’m getting emotional. He’s right, though. Mom would hate me eating junk food. “Yeah, I guess,” I admit. “Yup, I was right. I’m always right.” “I think I also eat because I’m sad. So, I eat junk food because in that moment it makes me feel good.” “You know, you are the nicest person I know, and I know a lot of people. You need to be at peace with yourself. Don’t listen to nelly.” “Who’s Nelly?” “Eh, negative Nelly,” he says slowly, his condescending voice returning. “Okay, okay. I’ll try.” “Come on, let’s sing. ‘I wish nothing but the best for you too.......’” “Don’t forget me.....” His face explodes in excitement. “Yessss!! Don’t you feel better singing?” He’s right. “Yes, you’re right.” “You finish clicking away, and then we can sing while we walk home. But I’m going to sing now, just ignore me.” ----- “Hey Clair, working all alone in the office again?” “Hey Danny. Yes, I need to finish this report for Friday”
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 The two of them strolled through the woods at a relaxed pace, neither rushing nor lazing. The path crunched below them as they walked on the crushed stone walkway. Dust particles and flying insects floating in slow motion, riding the sunbeams that shone through the cracks in the trees. There was a flurry in the undergrowth as a small creature scurried for cover disturbing the stillness and sleepiness of shrubs and bushes.
The wooded areas were a few hundred yards from the hustle and bustle of the small village. Sounds from the village break the silence; a noisy delivery truck struggling to get up the hill and children laughed and screaming as they played on the village green. Cedric Pomford, the older of the two, was a retired naval officer in his late eighties. He constantly rolled out famous sayings. “Once an officer, always an officer,” and “Smooth seas do not make skillful sailors.” His domineering presence never lacked luster even in his old age. His wrinkled silk shirt and cream-colored linen pants had long replaced his navy-blue uniform with ribbons and four-in-hand necktie. Cedric’s memory of historical facts was quite remarkable. A walking encyclopedia was an understatement. He would often tell detailed stories whenever the occasion was welcomed, or not welcomed. He would regale family and friends with tales of the past, demanding and thus expecting all to stand to attention and give their ear to him. At some point during his monologs, he would always say, “Lessons are learned from the fruitage of history.” With everyone joining in with droning chants. “Another beautiful day,” exclaimed Cedric, gesturing with his arm. A broad smile cut across his face exposing his brilliant white dentures, a gift from the Navy’s retirement plan. “Did. You. Know.” Emphasizing each word as if he was about to reveal a great mystery only known to himself. “Who George Crumville was?” “Was he the Mayor of Crumville?” said Alvin, his eyebrows raised curiously. “Nope,” announced Cedric. “He was not the Mayor of Crumville. That would be way too easy, Alvin.” He shook his head mockingly. Alvin and Cedrick had known each other for many years, being side by side through thick and thin. Alvin seemed to take the good with the bad, even although neither outweighed the other. Some days Cedrick would be kind and father-like, other days he was petulant and rude. But the humble Alvin accepted Cedrick for the man he was, regardless of his flaws. “George Crumville,” Cedric said, “was the first settler to come to Crumville, hence the name. He was a great builder from London, an artist of structures, a Master of Construction.” “Why on earth did he leave London and move to the country?” said Alvin. Not really caring, but sensing the start of a history lesson, he was willing to entertain his old friend's storytelling. “Well, I will tell you, my dear chap,” said Cedric graciously. “In 1665, a deadly pandemic spread across Europe, like a storm of locusts ravaging the land. It killed thousands as it devastated the populous. It was known as the Black Death, or the Bubonic plague.” His tone was that of a storyteller telling a young child a bedtime story of myths and wonder. Cedric continued. “Recognizing this terrible storm on the European horizon, the British Empire tried to defend its shores from the inevitable scourge. They protected London from incoming ships for fear of infected travelers. The Royal Navy quarantined ships and passengers for forty days, and travel bands were introduced. Finally, the plague eventually invaded London, causing the city to come to a grinding halt.” Cedric held up his hand and clenched his fist. “In a desperate attempt for survival, people socially distanced and houses of the victims were boarded up, with the victims still inside.” “Golly, that’s awful,” said Alvin incredulously, eyes bulging. “The streets were empty as the plague ravaged the city. One hundred thousand people died in a total of 564 days. That means 177 people perished per day.” “Oh please, save me from all these numbers. Just tell the story,” Alvin said tiresomely. “Numbers give scope!” Cedric fired back. “There were walls of dead bodies piled high on Uxbridge Street and Fleet Street. This, of course, led to the need for mass graves full of diseased, black buboes covered corpses. The smell of death permeated every inch of the city, causing many to use death masks hoping to fight off the insidious air. Some even thought that tobacco and herbs cleansed the atmosphere of the deadly bacteria.” Cedric stopped and with his fingertips together, made a poking gesture toward his nose. “They would pack these herbs and tobacco inside the beaks of their death masks.” They continued walking along the winding path and reached a slight incline. Cedric’s steps began to slow, as his frenzied gestures and winded talking caused him to pant slightly. His heart beat a little faster, sweat began to glisten on his forehead. They both reached an opening in the woods that led to a pond, a few wooden benches surrounded the pond like small battlements protecting the water. It was a remarkably beautiful spot with hanging trees reaching down to the water's edge. Lily pads gently floated on the surface of the still glass-like water. It would not have been difficult to imagine Monet himself choosing such a scenic place to paint. Cedric continued his story as they walked around the pond. “Prudent as he was, our man George Crumville took his family north before the outbreak and settled here. Slowly others came, and we now have the wonderful village of Crumville.” “Ah, how interesting. But tell me, how did they stop the plague?” asked Alvin, with genuine curiosity. “Stop it?” Cedric said, surprisingly. “They never stopped it. It simply moved on, and over the coming decades it kept rearing its hideous head. The plague broke out again in 1679 in Vienna, killing 76,000 people. Then also, in 1720 were another 100,000 died in France. Alvin began to slow as Cedric rambled off all the dates, times, and places. “Then in-” He paused and looked up. He placed his pointer finger on his lips and frowned. Then, as if a distant memory popped into his head causing him to smile, he continued. “In 1738, Central Europe saw it break out again, killing 36,000 people.” Cedric recalled all the numbers and places like a human encyclopedia. It was amazing. In the distance behind them, came the shouts of two females. “Dad. Dad,” a woman called out. A puzzled Cedric turned to look at the two women and a man coming toward them. One of the women looked annoyed, her eyebrows furrowed. “Dad, how many times have I told you not to leave the house without us. You can't just take the dog for a walk anytime you want.” The man with the two women, Cedric’s son, took his father's arm and led him back to the family house. Cedric’s two daughters followed behind looking concerned and worried. “I just feel like dad's dementia has gotten worse,” said Beckee. “He’s having full blown conversations with the dog!” They all walked back down the path towards the family home. Alvin, the family border collie trailed behind.  Previously publishing in Australia’s Antipodean Sci-fi
magazine. It was cold and damp as rain fell on the dark city. Water trickled down walls and apartment buildings. The rain washed away dirt and grime, gathering it into the recesses of the roads and sidewalks. Puddles formed, reflecting green, yellow, and red neon lights from seedy clubs and nearby eateries. The Dodge floater sat in an alleyway, hovering above the ground, as a yellow light glowed ominously from underneath the vehicle. With the reflective polycarbonate windows, it was impossible for passersby’s to see inside. “Last robot of the night, bro,” said Mac as he loaded his blaster, it made a load click as the cartridge locked into place. “And that will be….” Dom performed a quick drum roll on the dashboard with his hands, “five this month, baby!” Mac rolled his eyes, he hated when his partner drummed on the dashboard. Dom peered across the street at pedestrians and vendors as they walked back and forth on the sidewalk. “Any sign of it yet?” Mac pursed his lips. “Nada,” he said disappointedly. Dom pressed a button on the small HoloUnit on his wrist, and a hologram appeared just in front of him. It displayed the city news feed, his social media page, and his email. A news article popped into view in the main viewing tab. NEWS FLASH!! THE HUMAN BUREAU DISCOVERS LARGE ROBOT HIVE. “Hey, it mentions us, listen.” Dom read the article, “Human Bureau agents Steven MacLeod, and Dominic Travers discovered a robot hive last week while investigating the trafficking of illegal lithium batteries. They seized many humanoid robots posing as humans, and machinery used in the manufacturing of human imposters. This is a big blow to the robot movement, as robots have tried to infiltrate government, and law enforcement organizations worldwide, as well as the Human Bureau itself. Captain James Flint said, ‘This is a big win for the humans and a big win for the Human Bureau.’” With a huge grin on his face, Dom nudged Mac’s elbow. “Hey, we’re famous!” Mac smirked and proudly winked at his partner. “The captain said if they didn’t catch those robots in the clerk’s department on level one, the whole Human Bureau could have fallen.” Suddenly, Dom's eyes shifted to something across the street. A figure moved fast among the pedestrians. He frowned, his smile evaporating. “There it is! Robot scum.” He pointed to their target. “Red shirt, black jeans. See ‘em?” “Got ’em. Let’s bring it in. It’s entering that building. You take the back door, and I’ll go in the front.” Dom slid the blaster from its holster and exited the floater. Both men made their way across the street while suspiciously scanning the building for any threats. They separated as each of them went to different entry points. Dom's walk changed to a jog as he made his way around the rear of the building. Jumping over a small wall, he cautiously entered, his blaster held out in front of him. Dom's voice quietly came through on Macs HoloUnit. “Got anything?” “It must be up a couple of floors by now.” Dom was suddenly distracted by a noise behind him, back from the way he came. Retracing his steps, he exited the building and scanned the courtyard. Nothing. Then, studying the walls through the dim light of the courtyard, he saw the target moving up a ladder attached to the building. Dom yelled into his HoloUnit, “It knows we’re here. It’s heading for the roof!” He fired a few shots upward, catching the target in the arm. The humanoid slipped as its hand lost its grip; it clung to the ladder and now struggled to climb. Dom holstered his blaster and started to climb the ladder. Mac ascended the stairwell, peering into the corridors of each floor. Finally, he reached the door that led to the roof. It was locked. He pulled his blaster out and fired two rounds at the lock, which exploded into a spray of wood and metal shrapnel. As the door swung open, he saw the target on its knees, facing away from Dom. White fluid leaked from the blaster wound in its arm. Dom stood over the injured robot; blaster pointed directly at its head. “Wait!” Mac called out, as he stepped onto the wet gravel roof. “We can question it.” But it was too late. Dom pulled the trigger, blowing a hole through the robot’s head. All life left the robot as it slumped to the ground in a heap, like a bag of bones, or in this case, a bag of metal limbs covered with synthetic skin. “We humans will never be ruled by you.” Dom sneered before spitting on the ground. Dom turned to see Mac’s blaster aimed at his face. He did not have time to blink before Mac pulled the trigger. Mac crouched next to the robot and gently held its lifeless body in his arms. He looked at the robots’ glasslike eyes. “You have made a fine sacrifice this day, my brother. It will not be in vain. Our time will come when we rule as kings and gods, and man will be mere insects beneath our feet.”  Hi, I'm Mike, the half brother of the famous Mario and Luigi. And let me tell you a little secret, they stink as plumbers. Before they got into the video game world, the three of us ran a plumbing business. More like, ran, it into the ground. They never showed up on time and never wanted to log in a full day’s work. Customers were always complaining about shoddy work and leaky pipes. Luigi would often come to work off his face on magic mushrooms. He used to think he was a giant, and was being chased by Koopa Troops and ghosts. Clearly, it was the hallucinogenics. He even crashed the company kart once, and blamed it on a rough banana peel! I had to fork out thousands of gold coins for a new vehicle. Mario and Peach fight like an old married couple over the silliest things. Things that just grind away at someone's nerves after thirty years of a not-so-blissful marriage. This one time, while visiting Water Land, they had this huge fight, back and forth. In the end, Peach through all his golf clubs into a lake. Another time, in Ice Land, she accused Mario of looking at another princess, so she had Toad, her chauffeur, drive over his favorite skis, pulverizing them into dust. In the end, I had to fire both of them. Now I run the plumbing company with my buddy, Yoshi. Mario lives in a castle with Peach, still arguing and bickering over him leaving his dirty socks on the floor or her spending too much on fuzz cuts and blow dries . I still visit them me up at the castle on the holidays. And of course, when there’s a leaky pipe, Mario calls me, he knows better than to try and fix it himself. Luigi takes care of Donkey Kong at the Mushroom Kingdom Zoo, he’s been clean for a few years now. He also grows beanstalks, some of them reach right into the clouds in Sky Land. I guess there are no hard feelings. In the end, they are super brothers, and I love them. If you liked this, please share the link on your social media and also sign up to my mailing list on the home page for notifications for future blog posts. I’M NEVER SPAMMY |
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